So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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