yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
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I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
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Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
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