my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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