we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
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He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
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Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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