I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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