I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
You need Xanax blowdarts
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize