Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
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