why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
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