There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
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2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
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She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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