your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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