I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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