I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize