oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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