I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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