What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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