this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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