her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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