when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
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i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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