C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
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do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
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We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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