At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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