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I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
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