She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
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She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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