id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize