I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize