Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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