my sisters under your porch take her home
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
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