if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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