i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
she looked like the before picture.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
Randomize