She's JV to your varsity
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
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