Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
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