week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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