so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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