I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
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