McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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