Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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