Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize