I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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