I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
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And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
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