I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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