I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
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and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
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all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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