im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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