i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
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