PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize