a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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