Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
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