Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize