You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize