Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
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