Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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