So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
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